Is God mad at you? Is He angry because you call yourself a Christian but do not attend church regularly or fail to read His word diligently? Is God pleased only when you do Christian activities? Many Christians think that if they don’t perform as a Christian should, then their God is upset with them and that’s why they are experiencing set backs in their lives because God is punishing them for their under performance. If that’s you then what you think is not Biblical. You have religion. You don’t have a relationship with God. A religious person does Christian activities so as to keep God happy. They perform so that God will bless them.

2. Intimate relationship with the Father

Many Christians see God as a God of law (Old Covenant) than as a God of grace (New Covenant). That’s why Jesus came to introduce a new name for God and that is “Father”. Jesus called Him “Father” (Matthew 5:16) because their relationship is based on an intimate relationship and not intense performance. During His time, Jesus had a relationship with God while His enemies, the Pharisees, the Sadducees and the Teachers of the Law had religion. Therefore, we should follow Jesus’ example and relate to God in an intimate way instead of in a religious way. As such, when we attend Church, pray, read the Bible etc we do them not to get right with God. We do them because we have a relationship with God and want to know Him and Jesus better.

3. Performance culture

Our Singapore culture is one of performance and we grow up stressing performance (getting what we deserve) rather than grace (getting what we don’t deserve). Religion is about performance – getting what we deserve –  do good and God will be happy with you; do bad and He will be mad at you. You deserve what you get.

4. Grace & love

Whereas a relationship with God is about grace. It’s about getting what you don’t deserve. It’s about God’s unconditional love for us. He loves us not because of us. He loves us because He is love (1John 4:8). His entire genetic make up if I can use such a term , is love. His entire essence is love. He can’t help but love.

That’s why He sent Jesus to die on our behalf to satisfy the requirements of God’s justice as sin needs to be punished. Therefore He punished our sins by laying them all (past, present & future) on Jesus. After Jesus had absorbed all our sins into His body, He died on the cross and all our sins died with Him. Jesus’ death sets us free from the condemnation of sin. Jesus’ sacrifice satisfies God’s justice. Now God is free to love us unconditionally and sees us righteous (right standing with God) not because we perform but because Jesus had performed what we can never do.

You are now righteous (2 Corinthians 5:21) because of the divine exchange at the cross. Even if you later sin in thought, word and deed, you are a ‘righteous’ sinner whose sins are forgiven. Simply agree with God (confess) that what you did was wrong. Don’t condemn yourself. Trust that God forgives you (1John 1:9). You don’t confess to be forgiven. You’re forgiven, therefore you confess. Move on with your life. God has forgiven you and remember your sins no more (Hebrews 8:12)

Jesus last words on the cross were, ” It is finished.” (John 19:30). His death on the cross completely satisfied God. There’s nothing you can do that can ever improve upon what Jesus did. His work of dying on the cross on your behalf  to remove all your sins is finished. You only need to trust in His finished work to save you from all your sins.

5. How does God’s grace work?

God’s grace works in your life when you believe in the finished work of Jesus. Because Jesus died on your behalf, God delights in you. God’s grace means that the good you do will never impress Him. Similarly, the bad you do will never shock Him because it’s not about you. It’s all about God who loves you even when you let Him down. He may feel sad when you willfully disobey Him. But your willful disobedience will never make Him disown you as you are His child and no one can snatch you out of His hand (John 10:29) unless of course, you choose to leave Him. Rest in the assurance of His love for you. He delights in you because He delights in Christ and you are in Christ (1 Corinthians 1:30).

Those of you who are subscribers of my blog would have seen a blog with this same title, “Generational Curse” yesterday but can’t find it soon after. The reason is that the blog was still in a draft form when I accidentally pressed the ‘Publish ‘ button instead of the ‘Save Draft’ button. As such, the draft got posted. Although I immediately deleted it within 30 seconds, it was sent to all subscribers.

Even though I pressed the wrong button, my mistake was used by God  to assure a subscriber that she was not the victim of a generational curse. God timed it so well that as I accidentally published the draft blog, it reached the subscriber at the precise  time when she was confused about the issue of generational curse. That is how our God works. He is bigger than our mistakes and can use them to achieve His purposes. Proverbs 19:21 says, “Many are the plans in a man’s heart but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”

2. Generational curse is Old Covenant thinking

Now that my draft has been used by God to speak to a subscriber, I shall write a more complete version of the topic. This issue of generational curse arose from an Old Covenant thinking mentioned in Exodus 34:7 which states, “he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation.” The thinking in the Old Covenant was that if the forefathers had messed up, the subsequent generations would suffer.

Because of such thinking, some Christians (who belong to the New Covenant) think that since their forefathers had sinned by say, dabbling in the occult, they therefore now bear the consequences of this earlier sin even though they have accepted Jesus (who had saved them from their sins). Based on such wrong thinking, they conclude that since they now live a defeated life, it can only be due to the sins of  their forefathers. Some also think that since their parents had divorced, they too will be inclined to divorce and therefore it is better not to get into a serious relationship. Some also think that if their parents had a history of cancer, then they too will have cancer. With the fear of cancer occupying their minds, they have no inner peace and joy in the Lord. Such Old Covenant thinking is misplaced thinking for us New Covenant Christians. We are not responsible for what our forefathers did or did not do.

3. New Covenant thinking believes all curses removed by Jesus’ death on the cross

In fact, in the Old Testament, the prophet Jeremiah already denounced such wrong thinking and spoke of the difference the New Covenant will make in the new believer’s life. In the verses from Jeremiah 31:29 -30, we read that in the New Covenant, each is responsible for his own sin – “In those days people will no longer say, ‘The fathers have eaten sour grapes, and the children’s teeth are set on edge.’ Instead, everyone will die for his own sin; whoever eats sour grapes–his own teeth will be set on edge.”  These verses show the New Covenant emphasises  individual responsibility regarding sin. Therefore , one does not suffer for the sins of the previous generation.

The Bible states that under the New Covenant, Jesus removed all our sins –  past, present and future (Hebrews 10:12) when we accepted Him as our Saviour. Furthermore, Galatians 3:13-14 reminds us that Jesus died on the cross to redeem us from any generational curse which was what they believed in during the Old Testament times:-

“Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: “Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree.” He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit.” Therefore, we can rest assured that when we accepted Jesus as Saviour, He removed all generational curses from our lives and we can live a guilt free life in Christ.

Some people also said that generational curse comes upon people who curse their forefathers. I don’t think that is generational curse at all. If one curses one’s forefathers, it is no different from a sin which involves cursing one’s enemies. If one has done that, one merely agrees with God that one has sinned and reaffirms that God has forgiven that sin in Jesus‘ death on the cross. That sin has always been forgiven and there is no effect on subsequent generations.

4. You are free from generational curse

I pray that you will not be worried about what your ancestors had (physical diseases) or had done (sinful actions). Their health and actions are outside your control. When you accepted Jesus, He gives you new life, continues to forgive all your sins and cleanse you from any form of unrighteousness (1 John 1:9) – whether caused by your ancestors or by you. When Jesus, the Son Of God sets you free; you are truly free indeed (John 8:36).

As we stand at the brink of a new year, let us remember three Biblical attitudes of our Christian life. Our Christian life is a “ful” life. When we look at our past, be thankful to God for being there with us through the ups and downs. When we look at the present, be joyful as our security does not depend on our happenings but on our God who holds us securely. When we look forward, be hopeful as we have a God who always goes before us and will be with us; He will never leave us nor forsake us. We are not afraid; we are not discouraged.” (Deuteronomy 31:8). In the Bible, hope means “a confident expectation of good”. We can expect good because our God is good and what He does is good (Psalm 119:68).

2. New Year’s resolutions

Some of us may have made new year resolutions for 2012.  We bid the end of 2011 and welcome  the beginning of 2012 hoping that we can leave the unpleasant events of the past year and have a fresh start . Despite our best of intentions, we often find that we make new year’s resolutions only to soon break them. But that does not mean we don’t need necessary endings and new beginnings. Each year gives us a chance for new beginnings. But if we break our resolutions, does it mean we need to wait till 1 January 2013 to start again? Let me tell you the good news. Each week can be a new beginning. Every Sunday can be a new beginning since it is the day we remember Christ rose from the dead to give us a new beginning. Better still, every day is a new beginning. Lamentations 3:22-23 reminds us that God’s mercies are new every morning.

That’s why we don’t wait for new year’s eve to end something and start a new thing on new year’s day. Instead, we learn to trust God daily. We put an end to what hurts us and which holds us back from becoming what God wants us to be. We forget the past and reach out for what God has for us in the future (Philippians 3:13)

3. Share your reflections and bless us

Since we are starting a new year, I  decided that instead of  sharing my thoughts with you, it will be more helpful if you did some reflection on your own and share your reflections with all our readers. You can use the ‘ Comments ‘ section of my blog to share your thoughts. It is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35). So  feel free to share with us to bless us.

4. What is your Egypt?

For a start, reflect on the theme, “Necessary Endings & New Beginnings” .  Please read Exodus chapters 14, 15 & 16.  As you  read chapter 14, reflect on what God said in the last sentence of Exodus 14:13. In these words He taught His chosen people about what they needed to end in their minds. They needed to get Egypt out of their minds.  As you apply this truth to your life, ask yourself this question, “What is the Egypt I need to get rid of in my mind?”

5. Who do you trust?

Then as Exodus 14 ends, God taught them to have a new beginning which is to live a life based on trusting God alone ( Exodus 14:31). God showed them that in this fallen world, there will be troubles. But if they trust Him in their troubles, they will discover that He will come through for them. That was why God allowed them to go through the ‘ bitter waters experience’  in Exodus 15:22-27 so that they can learn to trust Him in every situation. Although they started with bitter waters , they would end on a sweet note. Are you wading in bitter waters? God is your healer and will turn your bitterness into sweetness.

In Exodus 16, God taught them that they needed to trust Him daily to provide for them. They are not to depend on human abilities but to rely on God’s ability to provide for them. They need not fear that they won’t have enough because they were not competent enough. God showed them that those who gathered much did not have too much, and those who gathered little did not have too little. Each one gathered as much as he needed (Exodus 16:18). God is your best equaliser when the odds are against you.

A Christian I know had sore eyes. His condition had gone on longer than expected and had caused much disruption to his busy schedule. I told him that sometimes in our lives, there are moments when God wants to slow us down to get our attention on an important truth He wants to teach us. When we turn to Him and ask Him what He wants to teach us through this trial, we will learn to trust Him in all that happens to us.

2. Perfect faith

Some Christians think that if they have more faith, then God can work faster in their situation. They think that if they have perfect faith, they can move God to act on their behalf. However, I have learned that perfect faith does not move God. Perfect faith moves us to trust God who doesn’t seem to be moving.

3. See with spiritual eyes the ‘random’ events

In the case of the Christian mentioned earlier, God may want him to learn to “see” with spiritual eyes the way God sees a situation. If so, that is one spiritual truth which will help him for the rest of his life. As a Christian, events that occur in our lives are not random. Behind the random events in our lives is a God with a purpose. He has a plan for our lives (Jeremiah 29:11) and will work it out according to His will. All He asks of us is to trust Him for what seems totally random.

4. God is angry with us?

Another mistake Christians make is to think that bad things happen to us because God is not pleased with us. Therefore, when a troublesome situation takes place in their lives, they confess their sins and step up on their Christian activities so as to appease an angry God. For example, they pray more, read the Bible more, do their Quiet Time more regularly and even fast to get God to work faster. All these actions spring from a misunderstanding of how God works.

5. Our sins are forgiven

Because of Jesus’ death on our behalf, God is not angry with us. God has forgiven all our sins; past, present and future (Hebrews 10:12). We don’t need to confess our sins to be forgiven. Instead, we are forgiven, therefore we confess i.e. to agree with God that what we did was wrong. Our forgiveness of sins does not depend on our confession. Our forgiveness depends on Christ’s death on the cross. When He died, all our sins died with Him. When God raised Jesus from the dead, He also raised us to a new life in which our sins are forgiven.

6. We are holy in God’s sight

We need to know that when troubles come our way, God is not upset with us. God loves us because we believe in His beloved Son Jesus. In God’s sight, we are holy (set aside to serve God), without blemish and free from accusation (Colossians 1:22) because of what Jesus did for us on the cross. The troubles we face are the means by which God is building our character (Romans 5:3-4). God is more interested in our character than our comfort. Therefore , our set back becomes a step forward in our growth in Christ. Ultimately, the way to live is to have a surrendered life; to yield to God and let Him have His say ; let Him have His way.

7. Will power vs yield power

I wrote a blog which explains this important truth about a surrendered life. It is entitled, “Will Power vs Yield Power”. Here is the link:-
http://chanmunwai.wordpress.com/2010/09/23/will-power-vs-yield-power/ .

8. God is good

God is good and what He does is good (Psalm 119:68). When we can “see” this truth about God, what we now find difficult to see through our eyes would have been worth it.

(I) What did Mary give up?

Part 2 of the Christmas story takes place in Israel; in a little town called Nazareth. Please read Part 2 of the Christmas story from Luke 1: 26-38. In Part 2 of the Christmas story, God found in Mary a suitable person whom He can use because she was willing to say the three words, “ I give up” :-

(a) She gave up trying to understand how God is going to work but she trusted that God can do what He said He would do – “For nothing is impossible with God” (v37)

(b) She gave up the right to control her life and said she would serve the Lord – “ I am the Lord’s servant” (v 36) – she was not afraid of what people would think or say about her being an unwed mother; of what people would do to her like stoning her to death, or the likelihood of being divorced by Joseph, her husband-to -be.

(c) She gave up her will to God and trusted in God to direct all that would happen after she surrendered her life to God – “ May it be to me as you have said.” (v38)

(II) The cure for sin became available

Part 2 of the Christmas story began well. Mary was not like Adam and Eve in Part 1. Mary was willing to let God have His say and let God have His way. Jesus was born through her and grew up loving God and men. Jesus taught how we could live according to God’s plan for us. But the spiritual disease called sin caused the people of His time to crucify Jesus on the cross.

As Jesus hung on the cross, the cure for sin became available for us. When Jesus hung on the cross, He absorbed all our sins past , present and future. Our sins entered Jesus’ body for the first time and separated Him from God. That’s why He cried out, “ My God, my God why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46). As God placed all our sins onto Jesus, He burned our sins in Jesus’ body. That’s why when Jesus was on the cross He said, “ I am thirsty.” (John 19:28). Then when all the sins we can ever commit – past, present and future are all fully absorbed and burned up in Jesus’ body, He cried out, “ It is finished.” (John 19:30)

That day on a hill, Jesus died and our sins died with Him. Sin killed Jesus and Jesus killed sin. Now you and I are freed from our sins because after Jesus died, God raised Him from the dead and gave Him new life. If you believe in Jesus, you also will have a new life . The cure for sin has been found. Believe in Jesus and you will be saved.

(III) Who is involved in Part 3 of the Christmas story?

Now we come to Part 3 of the Christmas story. In Part 1, the Christmas story took place in the Garden of Eden. In Part 2, the story took place in a little town called Nazareth in Israel. Do you know where Part 3 of the Christmas story takes place? Part 3 takes place in your heart.

In Part 1, God planned to give up His Son Jesus to die for you so that you may live. In Part 2, Mary chose to give up her will to follow God’s will so that God can work out his will through her. In Part 3 , you are the actor of the story. You are the one who will decide what Part 3 is like. Will you follow Mary’s example of total surrender to God? For this Christmas, will you be willing to say the 3 words,“ I give up”. Will you choose like Mary? Will you :-

- give up trying to understand how God is going to work in your life and trust that God can do what He said He would do?

- give up the right to control your life and say to God – “ I am your servant”?

- give up your will to God and trust in God to direct all that will happen after you surrender your life to God?

Part 1 and Part 2 of the Christmas story had been fulfilled. In Part 1 , God did His Part. In Part 2 , Mary did her part. But in Part 3, you have to do your part.

(IV) What will you say to God?

It would be helpful now for you to pray to God. He is waiting for you to ask yourself, “What can I give up for God? Is there a bad habit I need God’s help to give up? Are there hurts in my relationships, I need God’s help to give up? Are there doubts about God that I want to give up?” What is there in your life you want to give up to God? Tell Him now and then give them all to Him.

What I have shared so far are for those who believe in Jesus Christ. If you do not know Jesus as Savior, I want to give you this opportunity to let Him come into your life. Just repeat this prayer in your heart after me, “God , I am sorry for my sins. I lived according to my way and my life has been messy. I want to be in control my life but I know I can’t. I want to give up control of my life to you and invite Jesus to come into my life right now. Jesus, thank you for dying on my behalf on the cross so that I can live a new life with the help of the Holy Spirit. Thank you for forgiving my sins. Thank you that from now on, I will never be alone because you are always with me. Amen.”

(V) Surrender your life to God

I have said earlier that the Christmas story comes in 3 parts. Parts 1 and 2 had been written. It is up to you now to write Part 3. Part 3 is about surrendering your life to God. You can surrender your life to God any time. This Christmas is as good as any time to say to God, “ God, I give up, please take over.” Remember I said that Part 3 of the Christmas story takes place in your heart.

I would like to end my blog with the lyrics of a song which goes like this:-

“Christmas isn’t Christmas till it happens in your heart;
Somewhere deep inside you is where Christmas really starts.
So give your heart to Jesus, you’ll discover when you do;
That is Christmas, really Christmas for you.”

This song reminds us that Christmas starts in our hearts. God is waiting for you to surrender your life to Him – not just this Christmas but everyday of your life. Will you do it?

When the kids were young, my wife would play mental games with us. She would give us a quiz – “I have a car that’s twice as long as yours, twice as fast as yours, twice as light as yours. When we both drive to KL, I will always arrive later than you. Why is that so?” The children will always try to give their answers. But I will always answer, “I give up!” That’s my standard reply to any quiz.

One day, my kid came up to me and said, “Dad, let’s play a game. If my army comes against your army, my army will surely beat yours. Why is that so?” I gave my standard reply, “I give up!” My kid said, “There you are. I won!! You said “I give up!”

As I reflected on what Christmas means to me, I think of these 3 words, “I give up.” For me, these three words “I give up” are the words God wants me to say to Him this Christmas. But first, let’s begin with the Christmas story.

(II) The Christmas story comes in 3 Parts:-

(A) Origin Of Pain

Part 1  takes place in the Garden of Eden.In Genesis 2-3, we read that God created the first man and woman whom we call Adam and Eve. When God created them, He said to them, “I made all kinds of trees that are pleasing to the eye and good for food. You will never starve. You will always have more than enough. I have given you everything you will ever need. But I only ask you to give up one thing – don’t eat from one tree which is called the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

Why did God do that to Adam and Eve? Because He created them and knows what is best for them. God knew that if they don’t listen to Him and eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, they and those who are born after them, (that’s us) will have a lot of pain in their lives. The pain will drive them away from God and away from each other.

Life will become hard. Relationship with God will be broken and relationship with each other will also be broken. God wants Adam and Eve and all of us to learn to say, “God, I trust you. I trust what you say. If you say, don’t eat, I won’t eat. I give up this tree but will eat from all the other trees. Why? Because that is what God says. I will let God have His say. I will let God have His way.”

(B) Sin is a spiritual disease

But Adam and Eve didn’t listen to God and sin came into them. What is sin? Sin is a spiritual disease. A disease is a dis- ease; you don’t feel at ease when you have a disease. A disease bothers you and affects your daily living. You can’t see the disease but you can feel the effects of the disease. In the same way, Adam and Eve can’t see the spiritual disease of sin but they can see the effects of sin in their lives. Their relationship with God got broken and their relationship with each other got broken. They were afraid of God so they don’t want to be near God. They were ashamed of themselves. So they hid from God and from each other.

What happened to them also happened to us. We inherited their spiritual disease called sin. Sin was transmitted from them to us. Therefore today, we prefer to hide from God and from each other. We don’t want to go near to God. We don’t want people to know who we really are. We hide because we are afraid that if people know who we are, they won’t like us.

(C) A cure is needed

Part 1  of the Christmas story showed us that because sin entered us, we needed a cure for this disease. Part 1 may start off bad but it ends on a hopeful note. God is not going to give up on us. God will find a way to cure the disease called sin. What is that cure for sin? The cure comes at a very high price. God has to give up the most important person in His life; His most precious Son called Jesus. The only way to cure sin is to send Jesus to earth and let Him be like one of us. Let Him come as a baby and grow up in a sinful world. Let Him feel the pain which we feel so that He can free us from the sin that causes so much pain. Let the sin in men kill Jesus. Then let the death of Jesus kill sin.

First of all, how can Jesus be born? For Jesus to be born, God has to find a woman who is willing to give up what she wants and do what God wants. This brings us to Part 2 of the Christmas story which will be told in my next blog.

In our daily interactions with people, we will meet some who are nice and some who are mean to us. Due to our fallen human nature, we tend to replay in our minds the nasty incidents and hurtful words we encounter in our relationships. We become distracted by the voices of  these unpleasant people. Instead of dwelling on these negative voices and letting other people define who we are, what is the voice of God (spoken through Bible verses) within us saying about us?

2. God will strengthen you within

Does God think you are dumb? Definitely not because He says you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). Did He make you like the people you know? Of course not. He has wired you differently because He is a God of variety (1 Corinthians 12:4-6). For instance, He may have made you to be more quiet and introverted. Being so, you may, in front of certain significant people (whom you think don’t like you), prefer to be quiet rather than expose yourself to criticisms from them.

As such, you become overly conscious of people’s opinion of you. Such self consciousness will not go away just because you will it to be so. Instead, when you turn to God and ask Him to help you, God will go through these encounters with you, both the pleasant and the unpleasant.  Through such encounters, God will strengthen your inner fibres such that the sting from the unfair comments become less painful even though they are still there.

3. Battle of the mind

It’s a battle of the mind; just like Jesus’ battle with satan in the wilderness (Matthew 4:1-11). You remember what happened when Peter took his eyes off Jesus in the storm?  He sank (Matthew 14:24-33).  Tell God, ” Father, I can’t do this battle on my own. I need your help. When I hear words that condemn me, I remember that in Jesus, there is no condemnation (Romans 8;1). Nothing can separate me from your love for me (Romans 8:35-39). You will fulfil your purpose for me (Psalm 138:8). I will trust you even if the storm is still there. I surrender my situation into your hand as I am not in control but you are. And you will direct it for your glory, not mine. For your desired outcomes, not mine. Even if I don’t get what I want, I still have you”. Pray like this to God. Press on and you will have godly success.

4. You have godly success when God is with you

Godly success in God’s eyes is not the removal of pain but the presence of God in your pain. Joseph was successful because God was with him even though he was  sold as a slave (Genesis 39:23). David was successful because God was with him (1 Samuel 18:14) when he faced his giant (1 Samuel 17:45-47). Nehemiah was successful because God was with him even as he met with opposition when he built the wall.

5. Giants first defeated in the mind and then in the flesh

Trust God and persevere even when the situation is severe. It is a journey God will take with you even as you face the giants in your mind. Just remember – the giants were defeated first in the mind before they were defeated in the flesh (Exodus 14:13-14). God is with you. His name is Immanuel.

When you are facing difficulties in your life, you tend to be more preoccupied with your problems and leave God out of your situation. Your challenges are real and they are visible. But God is invisible and it’s so easy to leave Him out. The irony is that it is God who can solve your problems. Yet the one who can solve your problem is the one being left out while you try to solve the problem yourself.

2. Focus on God, not your problems

God has always been there for you but sometimes your challenges are so real in your mind that you take your focus off Him. Remember Peter walking on water in the midst of the storm ? (Matthew 14:22-32)  He was doing fine as he focused on Jesus. The minute he took his eyes off Jesus and looked at the storm around him, he lost heart and sank. But Jesus was always there with him. His one cry to Jesus was all it took to bring the power of heaven to bear on his situation.

3. Weakness turned into strength

Peter made many mistakes when he was following  Jesus. Yet he grew to become a strong and dependable leader of the early church. How did bumbling Peter become Peter the rock? Because he stumbled. The Bible says, ” We all stumble” (James 3:2). Our weaknesses become occasions for God’s grace to infuse us with resurrection strength – that’s why Paul can declare, “when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Cor. 12:10).

4. Keep talking to God

When you focus on God and saturate your mind with His truths as found in the Bible, you will see His perspective of your situation. Don’t just stop there. Bring Him into your problem by asking Him to intervene.

Talk to Him in your heart all the time about what you are facing. If you are about to take steps to resolve your problem,say to God, ” Father, help me as I deal with this issue”. That is the sort of cry that brings God’s full resources into your task. On other occasions when the pressure is off, just say ” Father, thank you for these moments of peace.” As for the person who is causing you the problem, tell God, “Father, help me to love this difficult person. Hurting people hurt people. Please heal what is hurting this person and bless him/her”. Keep talking to God (1 Thess. 5:17) and you will sense His presence more and more.

5. Setbacks can be stepping stones

God allows you to make mistakes. Therefore, use the mistakes to grow in the Lord. As you overcome one problem, another may arise. Your stresses will come back in different forms as you grow in the Lord. But with God on your side, you can only go forward even if it seems you are not progressing. Your setbacks are God’s stepping-stones for spiritual growth.

6. Get up and start again

Focus on His Words. Replace your doubts with Biblical truths. Stay close to your heavenly Father who loves you more than you can ever imagine. He will never fail you or forsake you. His one advice to you whenever you fall – get up and start again (Jeremiah 8:4). Will you get up and move on with God’s help?

When you want something so badly, not being able to get it can hurt. For example, you may want a job promotion and to get it, your company requires you to pass an examination. As you prepare for the exams, you have doubts that tell you that you may not make the passing mark. Furthermore, if you have nasty colleagues that look down on your capabilities, you begin to doubt yourself even more.

Such inner doubts which I call inner conversations can make you wonder whether your God cares about what’s happening in your life. You need a clear direction from the Lord but don’t seem to be getting any. Although you have been taught that God directs a Christian in his life (Isaiah 30:21), yet you don’t hear His inner voice guiding you. What you hear instead are the doubting voices that pulls you down instead of lifting you up.

2. Dark night of the soul

Sometimes, God’s guidance is as clear as daylight but there will be times when He is so distant that you wonder if He cares about what is happening in your life. The saints of the past call such a situation ” the dark night of the soul”. Has God abandoned you when you don’t feel His presence? Is He even there when you are enveloped in darkness? The Bible says that your God is not only a God of light but He is also a God in your thick darkness (Exodus 20:21).After you pass through the dark times, you will be able to say like King Hezekiah, ” Surely it was for my benefit that I suffered such anguish “(Isaiah 38:17)

3. Talk to yourself

When you have inner conversations that pull you down, follow the example of the psalmist who talks to himself and  brings God into his situation (Psalms 42:11). Like the psalmist,you counter the inner doubts with  Biblical truths which remind you of who you are in Christ. If you are the Christian who wants to be promoted and has to take an examination, you remind yourself that God has equipped you with abundant intelligence to get to where you are – you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:14).  In addition, you are a child of the God who promised to be with you always till the end of time (Matthew 28:20). God also said that He has a plan for your life which will give you a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11). Such inner conversations give you strength when you bring God’s truths to bear upon your situation.

4. You can’t lose

With God on your side, you can’t lose. You might get bruised along the way but He goes through your trials with you. Jesus was insulted, rejected , opposed, shamed etc even as He was following God’s will – what more us? Jesus knows what you are undergoing. Pour out your hurts to Him and tell Him you will let Him have His way in your life. Then trust Him to fulfil His purpose for your life (Psalm 138:8)

5. God determines your future

No event in your life (exams included) can ever determine your future. But your God of the future does. Rest in His love for you. Just do your best while trusting God to do the rest. He will surprise you!

1. Exercise your choice wisely

A Christian once asked me a pertinent question, ” Did God make a mistake when He created Adam and Eve who then chose wrongly and brought sin into the world?”. I answered that we are created as human beings who can love . If I am to love, I must be able to choose. If I can’t choose, then I am a robot and thus not human. Given this power to choose, I need to exercise it wisely with regard to God, others and myself so that my free choice will not result in bondage to me. As such, let us learn this truth – “You are free to choose, therefore choose to be free”.

2. From free choice to no choice

For Adam and Eve, they were created with the power to choose. God made all the trees in the entire world good for food and pleasing to the eye so that they could enjoy the eating process (Genesis 2:9). Out of the countless trees He made, God told Adam and Eve that they were not allowed to eat from one tree only – the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Therefore they were not lacking in food or eye pleasing food. Nearby was the tree of life which was also pleasing to the eye and good for food. Yet they chose to disobey God and eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and contaminated the rest of us with sin. By exercising their free choice, they ended up having no choice but to sin .

3. Eating from the tree of knowledge of good and evil

Some Christians may feel that if they were Adam and Eve, they would have chosen to eat from the tree of life instead of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. However, I still see many  Christians choosing to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. When a Christian continues to dwell on his past hurts and remains bitter towards another person for the wrong they did, such Christians are eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil – they continue to be intimately involved (know) with such bitter thoughts (evil). They are eating from the tree of knowledge of good and evil without even knowing it. They have free choice but they have not chosen to be free by being bound to their past hurts.

4. Eating from the tree of life

Instead, they should eat from the tree of life by forgiving those who hurt them (Colossians 3:13). You can’t have life if you hang on to death (bitterness). Jesus has come to give you life and life more abundantly (John 10:10). Don’t be like Adam and Eve. Choose to listen to what God says. Choose to follow God’s way. When you let God have His way and let God have His say, you have chosen to eat from the tree of life. As you do so, you have freedom of choice and you have chosen to be free from your hurtful past.

Which tree do you still want to eat from?